Another Goodbye...

Its funny how people are lost for words when they are running short of time. Maybe it was a random observation, but it seemed as though everyone knew it had to happen but tried their best to not talk about it at all, and hoping that last moment of bidding farewell wouldn't have to come.

Bottom line people come and go. Sometimes you move on whereas there are others that leave behind an irreplaceable influence on you life.

You're awesome and you will be missed. Looking forward to seeing you with your 10 kids:D

Bottom line: Failure to notice the good in goodbye!

11 Layers Games; Yes, I'm THAT Aimless

11 Layers Of Me


Layer One: On the Outside
Nickname: Too many to state
Birthday : 5/11
Current Location : The Coast
Eye Color : Dark brown
Hair Color : Keeps changing...Black for now
Righty or Lefty : Ambidextrous: Though more comfortable with being a righty
Zodiac Sign : Scorpio

Layer Two: On the Inside
Your Strengths : Friends
Your Fears : ALOT
Your Weaknesses : Chocolates:):)
Ambition in life : To b a good person

Layer Three: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
Your thoughts first waking up : Argh: Whats the time?!
Your bedtime : 3am/4am
Your most missed memory : Meetups @ GJ's && Highschool

Layer Four: Pick Your Choice
Pepsi or Coke : Pepsi
McDonalds or KFC : Macerz
Single or Group dates : Single dates
Adidas or Nike : Nike
Lipton Tea or Nestea : none
Chocolate or Vanilla : Choc late
Cold Coffee or Hot Coffee : Cold coffee

Layer Five: Do You
Smoke : Nope!!!
Have a current crush : Crush?! Not exactly...
Want to get married : Obv not now!
Believe in yourself : Yeah...but do need to be reminded at times as well...

Layer Six: In the Past Month
Drank alcohol : aha
Gone to the mall : Yup
Eaten Sushi : Yeah
Gone skating : Nope, haven't skated after 8th grade
Dyed your hair : Yeah

Layer Seven: Have Your Ever?
Played a stripping game : Yeah
Gotten beaten up : Yes, by aircon,neha and happy feet:P
Changed who you were to fit in : Not exactly;I just blend in

Layer Eight: Getting Old
Age you are hoping to be married : Haven't though about it

Layer Nine: Perfect Mate
Best Eye Color : Hazel or greyish brown;)
Best Hair Color : Dark hair
Short or Long Hair : Short

Layer Ten: What were you doing...
1 Minute Ago : Trying to find my cell fone
1 Hour Ago : Cleaning my room
1 Day Ago : Uhh too long ago to remember
1 Year Ago : Celebrating the begining of summer & Partying!

Layer Eleven: Finish the Sentence
I Love : you?!
I Feel : hungry
I Hate : the weather (too hot)
I Hide : emotions?!
I Miss : alot of people
I Need : FOOD


:D

I'm sorry

He's one of my closest friends, and honestly, we tell each other everything, we make each other laugh, we help each other through just about everything, we're there for each other when no one else is around.

But thats just what he is; My close friend. I wish I were able to live up to the "Best Friends" tag and not do this to you especially on your birthday.

I'm sorry for hurting you so much,
I'm sorry for not realising how you felt beforehand,
I'm sorry for bringing tears to your eyes because I couldn't return those feelings you had for me,
I'm sorry for not being the person you wished I could be,
AND I'm sorry for not being a good friend.

You will find someone better;someone that deserves your unconditional love;someone who's perfect for you. I've seen the tears,the anger the loneliness. Try as you may I can still see it.

-----------------

Its easier to say I'm fine then to explain how you've had no regard for someone else's feelings. Thanx to an awesome friend for being there for me when I needed someone most:D

Happy Day

1) SHOPPING
2) Movie-Time Travellers Wife(Can't complain about the company I had as well;)..)
3) Damien's Birthday surprise
4) The 1000+ word email<3

^^ In no specific order

The little things in life that matter the most; cherised moments with friends,making others happy,realising that you're being missed as well by someone somewhere in another part of the world:)

That Someone..

Sometimes it's easy to feel like you're the only one in the world who's struggling. Who's frustrated, or unsatisfied, or barely getting by.Who's feeling alone, Missing someone so much it becomes hard to concentrate on anything else.

That feeling is a lie. And if you just hold on, just find the courage to face it all for another day. Someone or something will find you and make it all okay.....Because we all need a little help sometimes.....Someone to help us hear the music in the world, to remind us that it won't always be this way. That someone is out there. And that someone will find you.

Pyar Nahi Toh Kya Hai

In your absence the heart will only grow fonder and In your presence it'll melt once more:)

& she can honestly say she has never ever felt this way before.

To give in....or not?!

Fighting for who were,want to be and will be is the greatest battle in life because we all live in a world where people want us to be like someone else.

Lesson for the day:
1) Not to do anything you're not sure of.
2) Have respect for yourself, your thoughts and our feelings


I guess both are exceptionally important because in the end we are the ones that have to live with the consequences of our decisions and regret is the worst form of punishment for a wrong decision.

(Thank you to two very informative discussions with two VERY different people who have the same thoughts regarding the same topic. As wel as making me feel like I was 16 again and needed babysitting:P)

Love you guys:)

Word of the day: Lykke til:D

24 hours

Happiest 24 hours in a LONG time:), Tiring yet memorable.

Said so much without saying anything at all.
Did so much without doing anything at all.

Word of the day : Frokost(Not my fault if the spelling is wrong)

:D

Tum milo na milo,na milne ka gham nahi,
Tum paas se hi gujar jaao, milne se kum nahi.
Maana ki tumhe hamaari kadar nahi,
Magar unse puchho jinhe hum haasil nahi.

Goodbyes..

Life doesn't give you the people you want, it gives you the people you need.
To help you, to hurt you, to love you, to leave you, and to make you into the person you were meant to be. Sometimes the right person happens at the wrong time and changes your life forever whereas some leave their mark like footrints in the sand which get washed away by the tides.

Just because I don' say it doesn't mean I won't miss you, just because I don't want to see you before you leave doesn't mean I don't care and just because I laugh off the fact that you'll be away for so long doesn't mean I'm happy about it.

I'll miss you more then you'll ever know, I care about you more then you'll ever think AND I'm nothing close to being happy about the next 3 months. For once I admit I'm scared, scared about what the holidays hold for the both of us. Then again, patience is good virtue and another day away from you means another day closer to the time we can be together again:)

...The chance for one last dance...

....It is better to end something and start another than to imprison yourself in hoping for the impossible....

Jeg savner deg (Sorry couldn't remember the whole thingy):p

Common sense or the Heart?

I really wish I knew which direction to go. Do I listen to my heart and jump into something so fast? Or do I use my common sense and take my time.

Either way, time is short and decisions are many!

Happiness?

Through all these years I have lived with people that hav been lucky enough to have access to any materialistic possession they wanted to. I've been brought up in a world of powerful,determined and influencial people. They all had everything one could possibly dream of. Though the look of satisfaction was never sighted in their eyes. It was always like they were searching for something.

Some people seem to be happy: they just do not think about it. Others make plans about gaining assets or owning things of great value. They think that the meaning of life lies there, so they never ask the question. Yet, despite all that, their eyes betray a sadness that they themselves are quite unaware of. I've seen that in alot of people.

I don’t know if everyone is unhappy. I do know that people are always busy: working overtime, looking after the kids, the husband, the career, the university degree, what to do tomorrow, what they need to buy, whatever it is they need to have in order not to feel inferior, and so on. They never have time for the little things in life.

People no longer appreciate the little things in life that bring satisfaction;like doing something for someone else. People are caught up in their own world, in the attempt to be happy and content by doing things for themselves.

Nothing is certain..

There comes a time when every life goes off course...Its not a nice place to be. You wonder what you'll do, every decision of yours will be clouded with doubt;both by others as well as yourself.

In this desperate moment, you must choose your direction. Will you fight to stay on path? Will others tell you who you are? Or will you label yourself? Will you be haunted by your choice? Or will you embrace your new path? Each morning you choose to move forward or simply give up.

There comes a time when every life goes off course... In this desperate moment who will you be? Will you let down your defenses, and find comfort in someone unexpected? Will you reach out? Will you face your greatest fear bravely? And move forward with faith. Or will you hide yourself in the darkness of your soul?

I'm really proud of the courage certian people show, even when they are faced with the most unexpected of situations during the most unexpected of times.

Thanx Happy Feet:)

Why on earth are you guys adament on making me cry?! I really am only human, you guys give me credit for things anyone would do for the ones they cared about, so that doesn't make me any "better" or any "special". You guys are my rock, I try and give back to you guys in the same way so that makes us equal:) How can you guys forget my MOST AWESOME senior year quote for the yearbook?! I'll restate it just so you guys remember that measured by miles you guys are far from me, by thoughts you are with me and by heart you guys are ALL in me<3.

"If there is ever a tomorrow when we are not together there is something you must always remember: you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think, but most important of all, even if we are apart, I'll always be with you.” - Christopher Robin


P.S Thanx for the awesome card I couldn't resist quoting it here as well...

'A friend is someone....
That sets things right when the going gets tough,
Who helps to get through when the roads get rough,
Who reads the mind and understands feelings,
Whose sheer presence is enough for the souls healing'.

Crossroads

It's been said that the saddest thing a person will ever face is what might have been? But what becomes of the person who's faced with what was? Or what may never be? Or what can no longer be?

Choosing the right path is never easy!!! It's a decision we make with only our hearts to guide us (That's when our brain decides to go on holiday). But sometimes we find our way to something better... Sometimes we fight through the regret of our mistakes, our anger and our jealously and the embarrassment we feel for not being the people we were meant to be.

And that's when we find our way to something better or something better finds its way to us. Everything happens for a reason. We may not realise it today,maybe not tomorrow but one day everything will fall into place:)

Word of the day=)

ADVANCEMENT!:D

Somedays I wish you weren't such a numbskull. At least now you have a 'slight' idea:)



...I have seen your city lights BUT have you seen my country skies?...
...& perhaps is uncommon fears or uncommon hearts...
...That makes us insincere & torn apart...


IF ONLY IT WERE THAT EASY TO FIGURE OUT?!

A little bit insecure...A little bit scared...

It'll eventually happen one day. The changing of topic or ignoring of situation wont necessarily work forever. Knowing where you stand always helps before you move forward with things.

It was hard enough to get to know you, now you've made it even harder by playing hot and cold. You're so casual about things that actually matter to me. We're from two different worlds and I really don't want to end up in doing something I regret the very next day. As laid back and random as I seem, there is a depth to it all, which you have been lucky enough to see. I don't want to wake up one morning and ask myself:"But what about that kid I used to be? What about all those memories? That’s the one thing they can’t give you in surgery: a new history".

I'm glad you understand all this to a certain extent. BUT I do wish you'd actually come out and say If all this means something to you, or if I was the one mistaken. I have to reconcile with who I am now, who I want to be and who I was. I really don't want to lose my identity and be someone I never thought I'd be.....

Weekend Insanity

The weekend exceeded ALL my expectations. It was interesting in its own aspect. Getting thrown into the pool PLUS breaking the DeTox vow had to take the cake.

I guess I also got carried away with the fact that not everyone can handle my annoying side(I really didn't know I had one though). But I'm really sorry for being a pain. Promise it'll never ever happen again:) Saying hello to the new NOT annoying me.

Thanx for such a sweet birthday card my love, I just had to quote the words here:)

"Who should have gifts wrapped up in love,
to show how much they mean?
Who's warmly thought of,
on special occasions and in-between?

Who should have flowers everyday,
because they're warm and kind?
Who deserves more happiness
than they could hope to find?

Who makes life so wonderful
with special things they do?
I hope that you know.....
that special person is you!"

Words cannot explain how lucky I'm to have friends like you guys. I just hope I'm as caring and thoughtful to you guys as you are to me;-)

Keeping your word

I wish people wouuld think twice before making promises. It may pass as exaggeration of being overly dramatic, but once you promise something you should keep it. That is why the value of a promise is worth more then anything. You have certain expectations from the person that makes the promise.

It is very ironic that people expect adults to be the mature,understanding and reponsible ones, yet little kids are the ones that know the actual value of a promise: a simple pinky promise of having no monsters under the bed gives them enough courage to sleep alone with the lights switched off. But as you grow up, the value of a promise almost vanishes along with time.

This is not the first time you've let me down,and I'm more then sure it won;t be the last. It may come across as me being harsh or angry, well maybe I'm. Giving me what I want because you let me down doesn't always help, letting me do anythingg I want doesn't help either. Somedays I wish you'd turn around and see that i value alot more things in life. Things that you have almost no regard for...


ps. Thanx guys for the gift,cards and wishes:)
love you all ALOT more then chocolate

Dyslexic/Cleaning Day

It was just one of those days, I miss pronounced every second word that came out of my mouth. But i was more then glad to notice that I wasn't the only one having speech difficulty. It must have been something in the "alcoholic air" according to crazy girl.

Cleaning on the other hand went exceptionally well. Whole room restyling with the added features of 3 new super cool pillows( ahh life is good). Alas now there is space for only one person on my bed...So the dragons shall not smile anymore;-)

I also realised that, I was the only one totally unmotivated and not looking forward to my birthday. Vee,Skitz,A/C,Happy Feet and My love are counting down for it. Guys if you're counting down to it because you expect me to be older and wiser by tomorrow, I better warn you now. It's ME and it's almost impossible for me to get rid of the child in me just yet.I’m learning to master the art of growing up, and let me tell you, it's a long process.

Its full of making mistakes, saying something you regret, getting grounded, taking the blame for something you didn't do just so you save a friends ass, staying up late, trying to fit in, laughing too hard and being mistaken for being drunk. Singing old songs WAY too loud. Helping your friends get good grades, even if it takes you the whole night.

Spending money too fast and blaming it on the temptations of advertising. Stupid crushes that don't make sense, falling too fast for someone you just met, trying to hold onto something that simply won't last. Lending a hand, giving advice, dressing to impress.

Smiling through the pain becuase you know that tomorrow will hold something better. Trying you best to hide your tears but having friends that are worse then the FBI, where nothing can be kept hidden from them.Learning to forgive and to put your pride on the shelf. The most boring Mondays mornings where nothing seems to make sense and crazy Saturday nights when no one sleeps. Making a complete fool of yourself in front of everyone, dancing on cafteria tables and owning the pink bench. Not taking life seriously, just having fun.

These are reason enough for me not to be " grow up"

:)

Kyun?

Har baar jab bhi main uska naam apne zubaan par laati hoon, tumhara chera utar jaata hain.
Har baar main baat ko taalne ki koshish karti hoon, lekin tum itne attal rehte ho humare baare mein jaanne ke liye,

Woh dard dikhta hain,lekin main kuch kar nahi paaongi
Woh chaahat dikhta hain lekin main lauta nahi paaongi

Main samajh sakti hoon ke tumpe kya beet rahi hain
Main samajh sakti hoon tumare liye yeh aasan nahi

Mujhse hazaar baar achi ladkiya milengi tumhe,
Tum ek ache insaan ho, mere karaan se apne aap ko mat badlo.

Naya Ehsaas

Kaise Batayein,Kyun Tujh ko Chahe,Yaara bata na Paaye

Baatein dil-o-ki,Dekho Jo Baaki,Aankhein tujhe Samjhaye

Tu Jaane Na......

Mil ke bhi,Hum na mile,Tumse na jaane Kyu,Milo ke hai Fansle..


Hum pass ho ke bhi,Tum aas ho ke bhi,Ehsaas ho ke bhi...Apne nahi..Aise hai hum ko gileh..Tumse najaane kyu..

Meelo ke hai fansle tum se na jaane kyun...

But when you smile for me, the world seems all right,ke meri zindagi pal mein hi tham jaye jaane kyun:)